My Left Ring-Finger

Guess who's going to the Orthopedic Surgeon on Monday?

This is the Art-Car to beat all Art-Cars.

The Importance of Listening Earnestly

North Korean nuclear 'admission' in doubt

South Korean officials said the radio announcer's key phrase could have been spoken in error or a verb may have been misheard by monitors, leading to the statement being misinterpreted.

Only one syllable turned "is entitled to have" (kajige tui-o-itta) into "has come to have" (kajige tui-otta), the official explained.

Original translation:
"In coping with mounting nuclear threats from the US imperialists, we have come to have powerful military countermeasures, including nuclear weapons."

Revised translation:
"In coping with mounting nuclear threats from the US imperialists, we are entitled to have powerful military countermeasures, including nuclear weapons."

This would explain North Korea's claim to have met the Human RIghts Committee's demand that all North Koreans are entitled to have equal representation and freedom from political persecution.

Close up on sunspots

"Racist" Japanese bathhouse fined

Operators of a bathhouse in northern Japan have been ordered to pay three million yen ($25,000) in damages to three men barred from entry because they looked foreign. The company's behaviour amounts to racism - refusing entry to the baths goes beyond socially acceptable limits

Sapporo District Court ruling
The Sapporo District Court said stopping the men from using the facilities was unacceptable and amounted to racism. The case against the Yunohana bathhouse in Otaru, on the northern island of Hokkaido, had been brought by an American-born Japanese man and two foreigners - one German and one American. Correspondents say the court ruling was unusual and potentially important in a country where there is the perception of widespread racism but no penalties are specified for those violating the constitutional ban on such discrimination.

'Setting example'

The court judgement said: "The company's behaviour amounts to racism. Refusing entry to the baths goes beyond socially acceptable limits." The case was brought by 37-year-old Debito Arudo, who changed his name from David Aldwinckle when he took on Japanese citizenship, Olaf Karthaus, 39, and Kenneth Lee Sutherland, 39, after they were refused entry to the baths two years ago. Mr Karthaus said: "This has made clear that discrimination against foreigners is illegal. It will discourage other businesses from doing the same, so discrimination should decrease." The men had also tried to sue the city of Otaru, 800 kilometres (500 miles) north of Tokyo, but the court ruled it could not be held responsible for failing to prevent racial discrimination in its jurisdiction.

Etiquette

Japan's public bathhouses have a strict etiquette which expects bathers to wash thoroughly before stepping into a communal hot tub for a soak. Alcohol is taboo as well as unruly behaviour such as splashing. No-one at Yunohana was available to comment on the verdict but a spokesman has previously said the ban on foreigners was introduced after visiting Russian sailors angered local customers by stealing their belongings and failing to obey the rules.

Japan's Jiji news agency said Yunohana began admitting foreigners in January 2001.

Granddad guns down terror squirrel

A vicious squirrel which terrorised a Cheshire town has been shot dead by a grandfather seeking vengeance. The animal had already attacked a man mowing his lawn and woman walking down the street, in Knutsford. But when it sank its teeth into Kelsi Morley's face, her grandfather Geoff Horth decided to act.

He went out and killed it.

[Erik says: Stephen King and Clive Barker will be meeting tomorrow morning at dawn to duel for the novelization rights.]

DNA tests for Swedish saint

A shrine to Saint Birgitta, considered as Sweden's patron saint, is to be opened on Tuesday so that DNA tests can be carried out to determine whose remains it contains. Birgitta, a widow and mother of eight, is highly popular in northern Europe, Germany, Hungary and Poland. The shrine, at the Vadstena church in central Sweden, is dedicated to Birgitta Birgersdotter (1303-1373), who was canonised in 1391. It contains the remains of three people - Birgitta, her daughter Katarina and Saint Ingrid - but only two skulls.

Birgitta's remains were placed in Vadstena a year after she died in Rome, while those of Katarina, Vadstena's first abbess, were added in 1389. The remains of Saint Ingrid, who founded a nearby convent, were placed there in the early 1500s, but a skull was removed from the shrine during the 17th Century and taken to a Dutch convent.

"We will know if Birgitta is here or in the Netherlands," said Marie Allen, a researcher at the Uppsala laboratory north of Stockholm.

[Erik says: Just when you thought that collecting Saint relics was a lost art!]

US says N Korea has nuclear arms

The United States believes North Korea already has a "small number" of nuclear weapons, Defence Secretary Donald Rumsfeld has said.

[Erik says: If North Korea has nuclear weapons but has not developed a reliable delivery system, *this* is the time for a pre-emptive strike against a rogue nation. Forget Iraq-- leaving nukes in the hands of these butchers and madmen is just frighteningly stupid.]

Soap stinker gets up nose of Japanese-Americans

"Sakura," a TV drama about a fourth generation Japanese-American from Hawaii who returns to her ancestral land to help teach English, may have been a ratings winner for government broadcaster NHK but most Nikkei loathe the show, calling it "insulting," according to Josei Jishin (10/15).

"It's simply not possible for a fourth generation Nikkei to arrive in Japan and speak flawless Japanese. Third generation Japanese-Americans don't even speak Japanese. And why does (Sakura), who's supposed to be American, speak English with a British accent?" House of Representatives member Taro Kono writes on his website. "NHK's lack of awareness of Japanese-Americans is extremely disappointing. I thought the Japanese-Americans who visited me in the spring would see 'Sakura' as being totally normal. Now that I realize that's not the case, I feel a bit silly."

More in link.

[Erik says: The topic of Nissei (2nd-generation Japanese immigrants), Sansei, Yonsei, etc., is of some concern to me as my wife is Japanese, and our children (when we have them) will have to deal with the fact that they will not be wholly Japanese nor wholly American, but a combination of the two. In America, this is not particularly unusual or much of an inconvenience; outright racists aside, most Americans seem perfectly happy to assume that everyone they meet is American and speaks English until proven otherwise. In Japan, though, the opposite is assumed: unless you look 100% Japanese, you are obviously a foreigner and will be treated as such (sometimes as a guest, sometimes as a nuisance, often as a child). And if you look 100% Japanese but for some reason do not speak Japanese fluently, sans accent, you're likely to be treated as a moron, a somehow deficient human being.

I have not seen the series in question (it probably won't make its way to the States for a few more months), so I have no idea how the stereotypes are handled. I worry, though, that in a country that prides itself on "common sense" and the phrase "everyone knows..." a show like this could do a lot of longterm harm to the image of Japan's emigrants.]

Fujitsu builds mobile-controlled robot

Japan's Fujitsu said on Monday that it had built a new security robot for domestic or office use that can be controlled remotely with a mobile phone. The robot, called MARON-1, has a shape that resembles a vacuum cleaner with an upside-down fishbowl attached to the top. Underneath the bowl are two digital cameras that have the look of disembodied eyeballs, but serve to remind users of the purpose of the new Japanese machine -- security and surveillance.

One of MARON's main functions, according to Fujitsu, is to monitor homes or offices for intrusions, or for checking up on persons requiring special care and monitoring. The 32cm x 36cm x 32cm robot, built by one of the biggest technology companies in gadget-happy Japan, comes equipped with digital cameras, a telephone, an alarm clock and other surveillance equipment. With its digital cameras, MARON can take pictures of an unoccupied home, which can be relayed to a mobile phone, or simply stored for later inspection. Such images can be recorded on demand through a mobile phone, the company said, or at pre-determined intervals throughout the day at various locations throughout the house. If an intruder is detected, MARON can sound an alarm and call a pre-set number.

Other notable functions on the robot include its ability to operate home IR-equipped appliances, such as VCRs, televisions and air conditioners. It also can also serve as a home phone and offers one touch dialling.

Human handshake opens data stream

A system that automatically transfers electronic data when two PDA-carrying humans shake hands has been developed by two Japanese telecommunications firms, according to news reports. Japanese newspaper Nihon Keizai Shimbun reports that Nippon Telegraph and Telephone and its subsidiary NTT DoCoMo have developed the system, which relies on the conductivity of human skin to transfer data between individuals.

Sources at the two companies say that the system allows up to 10 megabits of data to be transferred per second.

David May, an expert in wearable computing at Bristol University in the UK, says the system might provide a valuable new way to transfer large amounts of information. He believes the system might have an advantage over wireless communications by keeping data private.

The Salt Lake Tribune -- Nose spray boosts sex drive

Better than Viagra? That is what some researchers are saying about a nasal spray that causes both men and women to become sexually aroused. PT-141 is a synthetic hormone that works by stimulating receptors in the central nervous system to quickly spark desire.

"We're very pleased with the drug, which has proved to have an excellent safety profile," said Perry Molinoff of Palatin Technologies Inc. in Cranbury, N.J. Palatin initially tested PT-141 on rats, reporting that female rodents became so aroused they displayed aggressive sexual advances toward males.

And now clinical trials using humans have proved successful as well, and the drug may be on the market in two to three years. Last month, researchers reported a study of 32 healthy female volunteers, half of whom were given PT-141 and half of whom were given placebos. While watching erotic videos, those using PT-141 showed a much greater increase in the physical effects of desire than those given placebos.

Molinoff said that multiple studies on healthy men have found "that the drug is well tolerated and that its action disappears within four hours."

"Ideally this is positioned to be an on-demand drug," said Molinoff, explaining that someone would take it in anticipation of needing it, so that "when you're done the drug is done."

"To give Palatin credit, it is a novel compound that works fairly rapidly," said John Mulhall, director of the Sexual Medicine Program at Cornell University. "But it's too early to make any real conclusions."

[Erik says: Palatin's stock remains a steal at $1.75 per share.]

AP - After wind delay, private company launches rocket

FORT STOCKTON -- After a 3 1/2-hour wind delay, a private company successfully launched a 14-foot rocket Saturday night from a remote site on arid West Texas ranchland that organizers are calling Texas' newest spaceport. The 50 or so people gathered for the launch cheered when the slim white rocket blasted off, then roared again when it came down five minutes later with a parachute. The rocket traveled about 20,000 feet in 34 seconds and came down several miles away.

"The main purpose of this launch was to open the spaceport," said John Powell, president of JP Aerospace, a California company that hopes to make space more affordable and accessible. "With all the clearances and regulations that we've already accomplished, pushing the button today was really very exciting."

The launch site -- on treeless, scrubby ranchland about 9 miles south of Fort Stockton -- is a far cry from NASA. About two dozen Angus cattle watched Saturday's proceedings from a few hundred yards away, and a GMC van served as mission control. The launch was delayed because of high winds, which also forced the group to send only one experimental balloon into the sky. There were plans to send three.

The prospect of more launches has West Texas organizers excited.

"We're getting our foot in the door of new industry," said Doug May of the Pecos County/West Texas Spaceport Development Corp. "We're trying to diversify. We've got alternative energy with wind power, we've got shrimp farming, and now we've got space."

Rancher Gene Lyda said he is letting the company use the land at no cost. JP Aerospace, which has built and flown low-cost aerospace systems over the last 23 years, bills itself as "America's other space program." With a small core staff of about four people and nearly 50 volunteers, the company is trying to establish a private launch service. Using government facilities for commercial launches is expensive, said Alfred Differ, a volunteer who is the company's director of analysis. He said the company will launch just about anything from science experiments to stunts.

"Some people want to put something up there and sell it on eBay," Differ said. "We don't care. As long as it's legal, we'll do it."

JP Aerospace was recruited to the Fort Stockton area by economic development officials representing the city and Pecos County. May said the company is considering moving microsatellite launcher and near-space maneuvering vehicle projects to the site. May said the projects would create "about 50 jobs to start with." Selling points for the area, he said, include the low population density and the fact that there are no aircraft corridors near the site. He said the town also has broadband Internet connections and other necessary infrastructure.

The area's economy now relies on oil, gas and wind power. Said May: "We're trying to diversify."

Fort Stockton is about 220 miles east of El Paso.

Visions of Science!

"This image has been digitally created by the photographer to convey the revolution in mobile phone communications including the recently introduced WAP technology."

The judges seemed to have missed the Silver Surfer reference....

More great science pix at the link above. Thanks, TinyMammoth!

World's Funniest Joke

British Psychology professor Richard Wiseman polled thousands of people around the world to determine what makes a good joke. The product of the process goes something like this:

A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head.

The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: 'My friend is dead! What can I do?'

The operator, in a calm, soothing voice, says: 'Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead.'

There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says: 'OK, now what?' "

Candidate turned himself blue - Oct. 1, 2002

GREAT FALLS, Montana (AP) -- Montana's Libertarian candidate for Senate has turned blue from drinking a silver solution that he believed would protect him from disease. Stan Jones,a 63-year-old business consultant and part-time college instructor, said he started taking colloidal silver in 1999 for fear that Y2K disruptions might lead to a shortage of antibiotics. He made his own concoction by electrically charging a couple of silver wires in a glass of water.

His skin began turning blue-gray a year ago.

"People ask me if it's permanent and if I'm dead," he said. "I tell them I'm practicing for Halloween." He does not take the supplement any longer, but the skin condition, called argyria, is permanent. The condition is generally not serious. Colloidal silver dietary supplements are marketed widely as an anti-bacterial agent or immune-system booster, but some consider it quackery.

Space, military commands merger official

OFFUTT AIR FORCE BASE, Nebraska (AP) -- U.S. Space Command and the U.S. Strategic Command officially merged this week at a ceremony at Offutt Air Force Base just south of Omaha, Nebraska. Deputy Secretary of Defense Paul Wolfowitz and Joint Chiefs of Staff Chairman General Richard Meyers spoke at the ceremony.
Meyers said responsibility for the command will include computer warfare and missile defense. He says the mission's future is limited in the U.S. military only by its imagination. StratCom Commander Admiral James Ellis Junior is nominated to take over as commander of the unified mission. His nomination cleared the Senate Arms Committee and only awaits approval by the full Senate. That could happen this week. Ellis says the new organization has to think outside the box and find creative ways to protect the United States from its enemies.

[Erik says: And the militarization of space can now really take off. Expect space-based weapons Real Soon Now.]

Adam Ant punished

A judge said 80s pop idol Adam Ant had suffered a "temporary episode" of mental illness when he threatened pub customers with an imitation pistol, and sentenced him to a year's community service and rehabilitation treatment.

Justice Jeremy Roberts also ordered Ant to pay STG500 ($1440) in compensation to a man, who needed three stitches after he was hit in the head by a car alternator flung by Ant through the window of the Prince of Wales pub in Kentish Town, north London in January. "There is no question of a prison sentence here," said Roberts. "What you did was rather serious and could have had worse consequences than it did." Ant, 48, who appeared at London's Old Bailey criminal court under his real name of Stuart Goddard, had pleaded guilty to one charge of affray.

After the incident at the Prince of Wales, Ant was committed to London's Royal Free Hospital under the Mental Health Act, which allows doctors to detain patients for their own well-being. Paul Bowen, Ant's lawyer, said the singer was now having psychiatric treatment. Bowen told the court that Ant was angered when regulars at the Prince of Wales mocked his flat cap and combat jacket when he entered the pub on January 12. He later threw a car alternator through the pub window, which struck musician Pavlos Contostavlos on the back of the head. Customers pursued Ant, who threatened them with an imitation wartime starting pistol. He was later seen trying to hide the weapon under the seat of a cab which was stopped by armed police officers looking for him.

Born in south London, Goddard was midway through his studies at art school in the 1970s when he dreamed up a fantasy character called Adam Ant, a flamboyant stage persona who dressed in bondage-style outfits that made him popular with the growing punk movement. Critics hailed his music as daring for its constant reinvention and its hypnotic, African-inspired drumming, dubbed Burundi beat. He had 15 hits in three years, including "Ant Music," "Stand And Deliver," "Goody Two Shoes" and "Dog Eat Dog."

[Erik says: Just in time for the 80's comeback. Nicely done, Adam, and swift recovery. We'll need you on the front lines of VH1 soon.]

Legal threat for US 'Celebrity Survivor'

American TV network CBS and the producers of Survivor are threatening legal action against a planned American version of I'm A Celebrity...Get Me Out Of Here!
Executives at CBS, which shows Survivor, said that I'm A Celebrity... in which eight minor celebrities braved the Australian outback to raise money for charity, is too similar in format to their show.
They are now tryng to stop plans by US network ABC and UK producers Granada, to bring the show to American screens.
Lawyers for CBS have told both companies that they have until Wednesday to promise, in writing "that they will not broadcast or license in the United States any programming based in whole or part on the Celebrity series."

[...]

I'm A Celebrity...Get Me Out Of Here saw the likes of Tony Blackburn, Tara-Palmer Tomkinson, Nigel Benn, Darren Day, Nell McAndrew and Uri Geller stranded in the Australian jungle.

[Erik says: Uri Geller? My god! Think of the advantage his team would have in the "Bending Spoons for Matches" challenge! Mind you, I'm waiting for Pokemon Survivor, where Uri would have to face UnGeller for a million dollar prize....]

New Look

I've made a few changes to the old Blog:

* new "Graffiti on the Walls of Valhalla" banner (using the Subway font and some Photoshop)
* new set of links to other people's Blogs and Journals
* link to archives of my previous Blog entries, organized by week

Drop me a line and let me know what you think!

'Virgin births' puzzle shark experts

Associated Press

DETROIT -- Experts at a city aquarium are baffled by the unexpected births of three baby sharks to a mother who hasn't been near a male shark in at least six years.
The female whitespotted bamboo shark gave birth at Detroit's Belle Isle Aquarium. The births, often called virgin births, are among the few known at accredited U.S. zoos or aquariums.
Female sharks, like many animals, will lay infertile eggs even if there is no male mate around. The eggs are generally assumed to not be viable and thrown out.
But when the bamboo shark laid a clutch of eggs in late winter, Doug Sweet, curator of fishes at the Detroit aquarium, left them in the tank because he had heard about a bonnethead shark at a Nebraska zoo that had a virgin birth last year.
Sweet kept the eggs in the tank with the female for a while, then moved them to another tank where the first egg hatched in July. It was followed soon by the second, and the third egg hatched last week. Three or four more eggs may hatch in coming weeks, Sweet said.

[Erik says: As if I needed another reason to avoid sharks.]

Egypt Team Finds New Mystery Door in Pyramid

CAIRO (Reuters) - A mysterious door has been found in a previously unexplored shaft inside Egypt's biggest pyramid, only days after a similar stone slab was found in another shaft, antiquities chief Zahi Hawass said on Monday.
Last week, in front of television cameras, a specially designed robot climbed about 215 feet up one of two narrow passages stretching from a chamber inside the pyramid of Cheops to peer through a hole drilled into a stone door, only to find another door behind it.
Away from the cameras, the robot was sent up the second shaft, only partially examined in the past. It found another door, which had copper handles like the one in the first shaft and was at the same distance of 65 meters, Hawass said.
"I think we'll find another door behind it," Hawass, head of Egypt's Supreme Antiquities Council, told reporters.

[Erik says: One step closer to releasing the Curse of Cheops on the world....]

I Am A: Chaotic Good Elf Ranger Druid


Alignment:
Chaotic Good characters are independent types with a strong belief in the value of goodness. They have little use for governments and other forces of order, and will generally do their own things, without heed to such groups.


Race:
Elves are the eldest of all races, although they are generally a bit smaller than humans. They are generally well-cultured, artistic, easy-going, and because of their long lives, unconcerned with day-to-day activities that other races frequently concern themselves with. Elves are, effectively, immortal, although they can be killed. After a thousand years or so, they simply pass on to the next plane of existance.


Primary Class:
Rangers are the defenders of nature and the elements. They are in tune with the Earth, and work to keep it safe and healthy.


Secondary Class:
Druids are a special variety of Cleric who serves the Earth, and can call upon the power in the earth to accomplish their goals. They tend to be somewhat fanatical about defending natural settings.


Deity:
Solonor Thelandria is the Chaotic Good elven god of archery and the hunt. He is also known as the Keen Eye, the Great Archer, and the Forest Hunter. His followers respect nature, and only hunt when needed, but are quick to defend the forest from intruders. Their favorite weapon is the bow, and they tend to be extremely talented with it. Solonor Thelandria's symbol is an arrow with green fletchings.


Find out What D&D Character Are You?

Never forgive. Never forget.

I do not believe in a forgiving god. I do not believe in turning the other cheek in the face of madmen. I do not believe that mass murder solves anything or wins anyone to your cause.

I want the planners, perpetrators, and accomplices of what happened 365 days ago dead. I want them piled up on a pyre and burned, preferably alive, preferably screaming. I have no qualms about exacting an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth; I'll carry that torch myself.

Right now, logic and circumstance point us toward Osama bin Laden and al Qaeda. In this day of paper shredders, erased hard drives, and duplicity all around us, I'm willing to accept what evidence has been produced as damning al Qaeda. So hunt them down and kill them. I'm all for that. I'll bring the rope.

Next, go after the bastards who supported them, who grew them, who set up a world where an al Qaeda can thrive. We toppled the Taliban-- a great start. Now replace the Saudi Royal family whose oppressive plutocracy has made suicide a pleasant alternative to life without hope. Replace the Egyptian government that censors reason and promulgates hate. Eliminate the religious necro-crats of Iran who grasp the reins of power in that country in their rigor mortis-ized claws.

Then, when we have shown our commitment to doing right, when we have built our moral ground and staked our claim on doing right at any cost, topple that petty schmuck, Saddam Hussein. Forget claims based on the possibility of Weapons of Mass Destruction; topple the corrupt and evil because it is corrupt and evil.

And then, when we've done that, I want our way of life allowed everywhere, and to hell with cultural sensitivity: let all say what they think without fear of government censure, violence, or imprisonment; let all vote and influence the world based on their votes; let all give according to their ability, and let all receive according to their need.

Yes, I'm a dreamer. But I'm a dreamer who also believes in the club.

New moon found around Earth

By Dr David Whitehouse
BBC News Online science editor

An amateur astronomer may have found another moon of the Earth. Experts say it may have only just arrived. Much uncertainty surrounds the mysterious object, designated J002E2. It could be a passing chunk of rock captured by the Earth's gravity, or it could be a discarded rocket casing coming back to our region of space.

It was discovered by Bill Yeung from his observatory in Arizona and reported as a passing Near-Earth Object. It was soon realised however that far from passing us it was in a 50-day orbit around the Earth.
Paul Chodas of Nasa's Jet Propulsion Laboratory in California says it must have just arrived or it would have been easily detected long ago. Calculations suggest it may have been captured earlier this year.

When he detected the object Bill Yeung contacted the Minor Planet Centre in Massachusetts, the clearing house for such discoveries, which gave it the designation J002E2 and posted it on their Near-Earth Object Confirmation webpage. Soon however, its motion suggested it was in an orbit around the Earth. Its movements had all the hallmarks of being a spent rocket casing or other piece of space junk.
But experts are not completely sure what exactly the object is.
Observations made by Tony Beresford in Australia indicate that the object's position does not match any known piece of space junk. Observations made in Europe have failed to see any variations in brightness that might be expected from a slowly spinning metallic object.

Nasa's Paul Chodas says the object must have arrived quite recently or else it would have been easily detected by any of several automated sky surveys that astronomers are conducting. Its trajectory suggests that it may have been captured in April or May of this year, but there is still some uncertainty about this.

If it is determined that J002E2 is natural it will become Earth's third natural satellite.

Earth's second one is called Cruithne. It was discovered in 1986 and it takes a convoluted horseshoe path around our planet as it is tossed about by the Earth's and the Moon's gravity.

Astronomers, professional and amateur, are carrying out further observations to determine if J002E2 is really another moon of the Earth, or just a piece of space junk.

What lesser-known Simpsons character are you?

AI helps gamers keep on playing

Life goes on in Ballerium even if you are not playing
By Mark Ward
BBC News Online technology correspondent

Every computer game player knows that real life can intrude at the most inopportune moments. Just when you are completing a tricky flanking manoeuvre, or have got to the darkest point of a dungeon, the phone will ring, a partner will want to talk or your dinner will be on the table.

But Israeli game maker Majorem could have a solution to this problem, at least for players of its forthcoming Ballerium online game. The company has developed an artificial intelligence system that learns a gamer's style of play and can take over and play for them if they have to spend time away from the game.

Ballerium is an online real-time strategy game in which players create empires by controlling and creating groups of creatures, building cities and castles and gathering money and magical items. Urgency is lent to their task because the world is gradually decaying and the only way off it is to create a gate that will let a player's followers escape their doom. The world is populated by a series of bizarre races including the warlike Chiki-Kah, the Olligar, who are artisans, and the scheming Nee.

He said many players of online games become frustrated because their lifestyle limited their interaction with a game world. But he said the AI system in Ballerium could help players take part even when they were not sat in front of their computer. "The AI is based on genetic algorithms and can learn a player's style," Mr Gaash told the BBC programme Go Digital.

Obviously, these folks have never heard of Progress Quest. But now you have.

High speed condom to fight Aids

A new method of using condoms has been developed in South Africa to help the fight against HIV/Aids. An applicator has been developed to make the process of putting on the condom much faster and simpler. Using it, a condom can be put on in just three seconds, compared to the standard 30-40 seconds, the developers say.

Research shows that many people do not use condoms because they are fiddly and can be "passion killers". This prompted South African life insurer Metropolitan to fund the search for an easier way to use condoms and so help reduce the spread of HIV, Tyrel Murray from Metropolitan told the BBC's Focus on Africa programme.

"People couldn't put it on the dark," he said of a traditional condom - a problem he says the new applicator solves. About 25% of sexually active South Africa are HIV positive, according to the government. The applicator was developed by Cape Town-based entrepreneur Willem van Rensburg but is not yet being marketed. However it costs just one US cent more to produce than a traditional condom. It is made of polyethylene and comes inside the same package as a condom. To use it, you bend the packet, which splits open. The condom then slides directly onto the penis and the applicator "pops" off the condom.

"The intention is to make more people use condoms more readily," Mr Murray said.

It comes inside the traditional condom package. As a life insurer, Metropolitan has an interest in helping people live longer he said, explaining why he had agreed to fund the project.

And Mr Murray also gave it his personal seal of approval. "It was fun," he said. "I'm an old married man. I need the novelty."

Mrs. Murray was unavailable for comment.

Frenchman ready for daredevil dive

Frenchman Michel Fournier begins his assault on four extraordinary world records this weekend. The retired army officer will attempt to make the highest ever parachute jump - from 40 kilometres up (131,200 feet). In so doing, he will fall further and faster than any jumper before him, reaching supersonic speeds between 1,200 and 1,600 kilometres per hour (between 745 and 1,000 mph).

Just to get into position to make the attempt he will need to break the world altitude record for a balloon flight. Fournier is now waiting for the right conditions for launch over Saskatchewan, Canada. "Michel is ready and he is feeling great," project spokeswoman Diane de Robianot told BBC News Online. "If the weather is good, he will go on Sunday - but we can't say yet if the conditions will be just right."

Special techniques

The 58-year-old Frenchman is calling it Le Grand Saut - The Super Jump. He has been working towards his goal for more than 10 years and will rely on state of the art technology to take him up safely and bring him down alive. A British launch team left London on Friday to prepare the enormous helium envelope that will take Fournier high into the stratosphere.

The canopy, designed and manufactured by the famous balloonist Don Cameron and his company in Bristol in the west of England, weighs three-quarters of a tonne and will swell to more than half a million cubic metres at its maximum altitude. "It's astonishing that anyone is prepared to do this," said Hannah Cameron of Cameron Balloons. "And it has presented a number of problems for us. For example, we couldn't glue the fabric of the balloon together because of the extreme cold up there. It would just come apart. We've had to use specialist welding techniques on the fabric", which Cameron describes as a plastic not unlike the material used to make freezer bags.

Update (9/21/02): According to the official website, the launch has been delayed until next May (you know, when Canadians actually begin to see snowmelt). Sigh. Something to look forward to, I suppose.

Blair which Project?

I've been trying hard to understand why Tony Blair would defy public opinion and his own generally liberal ideals to support the invasion of Iraq. It can't be economic-- it's not as if Bush & Co. can expect to punish everyone who opposes them. Why, then?

And then it hit me. Blackmail. Bush Sr. was head of the CIA back in the 70's. Surely it wouldn't be too difficult for him to garner something embarrasing on our man Tony. The only question, then is this: What could possibly be so damaging that Tony would throw in support at the risk of possibly losing the leadership of the U.K.? The answer sits to the left.

Tony Blair is one of the Illuminated Brotherhood, and the Bush Administration is threatening to blow the whistle. Check out that Masonic handsign he's making-- clear as bloody day.

Damn it, Tony. How could you be so careless?

Contraceptive patch gets EU go-ahead

A contraceptive patch has been approved for use across Europe.
Evra, a smooth beige patch is applied to the skin. A patch lasts for a week at a time and is used for three consecutive weeks, with the fourth week "patch free". Its makers say it is 99% effective, like the Pill, but with the convenience and ease of a once-a-week dose. Like the pill, it works by suppressing ovulation and tricking the body into believing it is pregnant.

But the patch, which is set to be launched in Europe in the second half of 2003, delivers hormones through the skin and into the bloodstream instead of through the digestive system. This means women would not be affected if they experienced vomiting or diarrhoea. Family planning experts say the convenience factor should make the product easier to use, reducing unwanted pregnancies.

'Good news'

The patch can be worn under clothing on the buttocks, the abdomen, the upper torso or the upper outer arm. Trials of the patches carried out by makers Jansenn-Cilag, part on 3,000 women in Europe, South Africa and North America showed Evra was well tolerated and had similar side effects to the Pill. The European Medicines Agency (EMA) approved the product earlier in the year, but that decision had to be rubber-stamstamped by the European Commission before the patches could be licensed.

It is already available on prescription in the US and has recently been approved in Canada. Anne Weyman, chief executive of the Family Planning Association, said: "This is good news for women. It works in the same way as the Pill, but you don't have to remember to take it every day. As such, it could help to reduce unwanted pregnancies."

Bill Simon, Antichrist

Hey, California! Imagine for a second that it's November 2000 again, and YOU have the power to prevent Bush from getting into office. The catch (and there's always a catch) is that the candidate you'll have to vote for has not exactly warmed your heart recently, what with the economy in the tank, the energy crisis looking mishandled, and education still in the tank. Given the chance, would you make sure that at least Bush doesn't get a chance to screw things up the way he has?

You betcha. So now it's nearing November 2002, and your choices are Bill Simon (a psychopathic businessman with a history of dubious deals and a rabid anti-abortion, anti-gay, anti-immigrant platform toned down to appeal to swing voters) and Grey Davis (admittedly, not the most liberal candidate, but better than Satan). In 2000, a lot of folks with good intentions managed to vote Bush into the White House by either not voting for Gore or by voting for Nader. Let's not repeat that mistake.

Vote for Davis. He's the lesser of the two evils, and he'll do until we can fix the system.

Not registered to vote yet? No problem! Click here to go to the State of California's Online Registration page.

Boondocks to the Rescue

John Walker Lindh: Flight Risk or Political Prisoner?

Revisited. Let us review: Some say John Walker Lindh should be denied bail and kept in prison because he's a strong flight risk, an anti-American, a former Taliban soldier, and a piece of garbage. I reckon that the argument that he's a strong flight risk is mitigated by his notoriety, that being anti-American is not a crime, that fighting in another country's army is not a crime, and that there are plenty of pieces of garbage free here in the U.S. spreading hate and paranoia, and that none of this justifies keeping a man in prison while the federal government racks its brains for a means to put this guy away for life.

Keeping a man whose guilt (let alone crime) is far from certain in prison strikes me as being a wee bit too much like what we're always accusing the bad guys of doing. If we want to rescue the moral high ground here, at least let the man live under house arrest.

But then, this is the sort of thing I've come to expect from a justice system based on punishment and revenge rather than on actual justice.

Bahrain bans Al Jazeera TV

Now people might applaud the Bahrainians for their momentous decision to ban the news agency that has broadcast several bin Laden videotapes over the protests of the U.S. government, but to those people I say, check this out:

"According to a news bulletin on the Qatar-based channel, Mr al-Hamr said the ban was being imposed because the station was biased towards Israel and against Bahrain."

AND

"We believe (Al Jazeera) is suspect and represents the Zionist side in the region. We will not deal with this channel because we object to its coverage of current affairs. It is a channel penetrated by Zionists."
Information Minister Nabil al-Hamr (from report on Al Jazeera)

Ah-- bwhat?!? And so our coveted Paranoia-as-a-Way-of-Life award goes to Bahrain. (Sorry, Fidel.)

Long Live Ska.

More importantly, long live Ska covers of otherwise unnecessary music. Case in point: a cover of Snoop Dog's "Gin and Juice."

Despite wild speculation that everyone from Sublime to Weezer was responsible for this little gem, the actual culprits turned out to be a rather obscure ska-act-cum-pop-group called The Berlin Project. Cannot, will not recommend the band (not based on one song, anyway), but their rendition of "Gin and Juice" is right on.

Froguts.com: not for the faint of heart.

As for me, I had to dissect a frog in seventh-grade science. It was truly a disaster. Well, not so much for the frog, mind, nor for my peace of mind, but just because I couldn't find half of the organs we were supposed to find. The damn things are small, and I've got huge hands. After doing a botch job removing the tongue and brain, I really should have just given up, but no, I had to push on and make sure no one was ever going to reanimate this poor amphibian. Ah, well. So much for my dreams of becoming a surgeon.

Fortunately, Froguts.com handles the knife for you, so you needn't worry about accidentally carving your intitials in the poor beast. Do bear in mind that this may bring back a touch of the nostalgic, so if your own dissection experiences haven't been the best, enter at your own discretion.

It all started with Andre the Giant. Then it was Hello Kitty, the Dalai Lama, and, eventually, Ralph Nader. They all had posses. Then Gary Coleman, Barry White, and even Gargamel. They all had posses.

So why not the hippest, coolest, smartest physicist on the planet?

So now, thanks to the power of Photoshop, MC Hawking has a posse. Tremble.

Since this doesn't seem apparent to some people, let's go over why the Homeland Security Advisory System is bound to cause more harm than good.

1. The Advisory System is based on relative words which have no objective value to them. Severe? High? Elevated/Significant? Guarded/General? In the muddled vocabulary of government-speak (or worse, Mil-speak), what do these words mean? If Severe, should we expect the National Guard to patrol the streets? If Elevated, should we merely be turning in our treasonous grandmothers?

2. These colors and words by themselves do nothing to alert the general public to the nature of a given threat-- is it in the water supply? a pocket-nuke? a birkenstocker buying fair-trade coffee instead of synthetic American?

3. Security alerts without clarifying information will indeed raise alertness levels, but it will almost certainly also induce higher anxiety levels and a greater inclination to panic, and if this panic is not followed by an event, then the next wave of security alerts will result in apathy and disinclination to pay attention, thereby undermining the system itself.

4. It's just plain goofy. It's like something a bunch of 8th graders would come up for a project based on 1984: "Hey, Bobby, what could we do to illustrate ways of panicking people and keeping them disinformed?" "I know, we'll flash colors to simulate varying levels of expected xenophobia!" "Man, that's TIGHT!"

In other news, Darth Rumsfeld slaughtered the White House Press Corps when they questioned whether Tony Blair would approve plans to attack Iraq.

"He will join us or die," remarked the Sith Lord, adding, "We got Death Star."

I had my first cigarette when I was nineteen years old. I was living in London at the time, in a flat just off Bayswater Station. Like many other college students at the time, my hobbies included listening to alternative bands, yapping with friends, and drinking copious and damaging amounts of alcohol. That night we were knocking back Jack Daniels straight from the bottle, and I’d had the lion’s share. My friend sitting to my left asked my friend sitting to my right for a fag. My friend to the right lit a fag and passed it to me to pass on. I asked if I might have a drag. Sure, said my friend to the left. I took a good-sized gulp of smoke straight down my lungs without a cough or wince, then passed the fag on. Oh, said my friend to the right, I didn’t know you smoked. I don’t, I answered. Then you’ve had more than enough of this, remarked my friend to the left, taking the bottle away.

The next day, in addition to a wicked hangover, I had an exquisitely painful need for a cigarette. I could feel the ghost of one in my fingers. I could taste the smoke on the back of my tongue. I could feel the nicotine buzz echoing faintly just beyond the reach of memory. I Wanted a Smoke.

And so, naturally, I made myself not have one.

The jones left me the next day and has never returned. I now smoke perhaps half a dozen cigarettes per year, mostly when drunk, usually when drinking with smokers, and I never feel that need to have another. I chalk it up to my perverse need for self-denial. Mind you, the ones I do smoke are mighty, mighty fine, like smoking for the first time all over again.

It’s now thirteen years later, and I find myself wanting something very different from a smoke. I want to browse and post on the Warren Ellis Forum, a webforum ostensibly designed to be a meeting place for people in the comics industry but in fact just a really cool place to hang out with really cool people. Also known as a Timesink.

I have enough Timesinks.

So now I’m limiting myself to an hour of WEF per day. I’ll never make the postaholic list this way, but that’s a small price to pay for a bit more control. Hopefully that hour per day will all the more exquisite for its scarcity.

REVIEW: The Deep Blue Sea (with Spoilers)

I put off watching this movie for a long time because I have a love-hate relationship with sharks. This is not based on personal, physical experience with actual sharks but is instead based on a lifelong love affair with the ocean. I love to swim in the sea. I have swum and played in the ocean since before I can remember. I have swum during the day and at night, in calm and storm, in waves that have towered twice my own considerable height above me and smooth water stretching sixty or more feet below me, in clear blue water and murky greens and greys, in water that seemed barely cooler than my own skin and water cold enough to turn my legs blue. Although scuba diving is contraindicated for me (for health reasons I'll be glad to explain later, if folks wish), I do snorkel, and I have played around fish as big as my arm.

I do not fear the ocean.

The shark, however, particularly the Great White, with its predilection toward attacking surface-swimming seal-like things from sixty feet down in murky water, scares me senseless. I have this horrifying fear of being grabbed by something beneath the waves and pulled down to my death. It's the suspense more than anything else, really. I mean, sure, I'd hate to have the actual tragedy played out, but the anticipation of the attack, that horror generated by a powerful imagination, is greater to me now than any attack could ever be. And yet....

The shark holds an almost totemic place in my psyche. The ferocity, the drive, the pure skill with which it hunts its prey, its amazing social structure which rivals that of wolves in its complexity, its incredible, sleek form so well adapted to its environment-- it is at once bogey-man and exquisitely beautiful hunter, both psychotic murderer and perfect warrior-king. It is Strength and Courage and the Chariot all rolled into one.

And so it is that the shark compels and repels me, fascinates me and revolts me.

Why then, you might ask, would I rent a movie devoted to the use of the shark as horror device, as malign, malicious intelligent monster? Why, indeed.

Perhaps because I knew, deep down inside, that The Deep Blue Sea would not be that scary. Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of good old-fashioned jump-out-of-your-skin frights. It's just that the majority of these are telegraphed from a mile away, so that by the time the "boo" arrives, I'd already been through the shock and past it.

The movie works very hard to establish that these are particularly clever, super-intelligent sharks, both bigger and smarter than their paltry non-enhanced brethren on whom they evidently feast. The sharks are supposed to be so intelligent, in fact, that they seem to have set the whole movie up just so that they can get out into the Deep Blue Sea (hence the title). The most obvious problem with this idea is that the elements that cause the disaster that eventually leads to the crew being trapped are themselves completely outside of the scope of even these super-bright sharks.

Exhibit A: a monstrous storm 
Exhibit B: an opportunity to take an arm off at the elbow 
Exhibit C: a faulty winch on a helicopter 
Exhibit D: big-ass explosions-- even though the fuel line had been expressly turned off

The best I can draw from all this is that these sharks are really good at taking advantage of opportunity when it knocks.

The peculiar nature of the sharks' intelligence, however, is inevitably aided by the amazing lack of intelligence evidenced by the crew, all of who are described as being at "the top of their game." (Apparently, their game is not "Survivor: Horror Movies.") From the very start we are presented with what can only be described as dumb, dumb, DUMB behavior: going skin diving with the sharks to remove a license plate from the mouth of one of the specimens; going out into the open water when the lights and cameras have been shut down (presumably by the sharks); crouching down near the head of a supposedly sleeping shark to make pithy remarks; standing right next to a big water entrance while making an inspirational speech; and heading down into the water-flooded sections of the base to retrieve some ill-described paperwork that's so important the lead scientist keeps it in her personal locker. And let's not forget constantly reaching out over the murky, shark-infested water to grab items that are just out of reach. If these yahoos can isolate a cure for Alzheimer's, I expect that a team of moderately competent grad students from UCSF will give us a cure for cancer any day now.

The best part of the movie, in my opinion, was the (uninentional?) snub paid to Leviathan and Deep Star Six: the black guy gets to attack the monster at the end, and live.

In short, I hope that the next team of scientists to go mucking about trying to get brain cures from the brains of encephallically enhanced sharks brings back a cure for silliness. It might have made the difference in this movie.

John Lindh was denied bail today.

For some people, this was a no-brainer. As Andrew Solovay, a person on one of the lists I'm on, put it:

"He changed his name, left the country, and moved to
the *other side of the freaking world*. He wrote letters to his family
saying how glad he was that he wasn't in America any more, then he stopped
writing completely. We found him and dragged him here in chains. And,
incidentally, he's up for several life sentences."

The last two are pretty convincing arguments. After all, we don't grant bail to accused murderers who've been brought in after being featured on America's Most Wanted.

Then again, John Lindh is not an accused murderer. He's an accused member of al Qaeda. And he wasn't caught in some dastardly al Qaeda terrorist plot. He was captured along with a bunch of other Taliban soldiers.

Why should this make a difference? Because unless the prosecution has some incredible incriminating evidence they haven't shared with the world, his only provable crime is being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

It's not a crime to change your name. (In Japan, my name is Ehreekoo Neeroosehn.) It's not a crime to leave the country. (I left it twice for extended periods of time.) It's not a crime to move to the other side of the world. (I moved to Japan.) It's not a crime to be glad you're not in America nor to write letters to that effect. (I wrote letters to that effect.) It's not a crime to stop writing to people you know back in the States. (Although it is a faux pas and does nothing to endear you to those you've left behind, as I found out from personal experience.)

From all accounts, John Lindh left the country to study Arabic and Islam in Yemen in February 2000. Unless he's some kind of amazing prodigy (and accounts written by his fellow students assure us that he is/was not), I guarantee you that my Japanese is better than his Arabic. This leads me to ask:

Would you consider me a strong flight risk?

John Lindh may be a terrorist. He may be a loyal Taliban soldier. He may also be a stupid kid who got mixed up with the wrong ideology. I agree that we have to take all of these possibilities seriously. For the sake of his human rights, however, I personally believe that what he really needs is his Mom and Dad.

. . . it's not as if the FBI wouldn't be watching him 24/7 in his house anyway.